Friday, February 22, 2013
For the Love of a Mom
My daily devotional called for “trust in God’s greater plans as He does His far better work in the history of our lives” (Joe Stowell, Our Daily Bread, February 9, 2013). It suggested that rather than be annoyed by “anything that diverts me from my routines and plans” (and that sometimes the diversion can even be “unsettling and painful”), we should consider them “divine diversions”.
I not only can say a hearty “Amen to that!” I know personally the difference it can make when we step back and consider all that God may be doing and simply trust what we do not understand or cannot see. And for some reason, this directed my thinking to being a mom (like so many things do!).
What beautiful things have been a part of my experiences, and I am forever grateful to the Giver of all good things. I know and understand, to the depth of my limited understanding, the love and grace of a forgiving God. I am His, and He is mine. I enjoy a relationship that is personal, and it is real. My relationship with the God of the universe through the undeserved death of His Son Jesus, has awed me since my young heart first grasped this great and mind-boggling truth. And even though still, I wonder why or how, I embrace it and cherish it. I think of the many “diversions” that have come my way to direct me and lead me down the path I have taken and I have to just step back and with a huge sigh of relief, say “Thank God He has been in charge and not me!”
That’s not to say I have always been the willing and obedient child. I’m grateful that He is as patient as He is forgiving! And I think of all the people that have built into my life. Some of them have no idea of the impact they have made as our paths crossed for a moment or a season. They each have a place of meaning and significance in my life. Every role I have been allowed, from daughter to sister, to granddaughter and niece, to cousin, to friend and neighbor, from aunt to daughter-in-law to mother-in-law and sister-in-law, to wife, mother and now grandmother, they represent a very full and good life.
But this mom thing…being a parent, I don’t know. I’ve spent the greater part of my life now doing it, parenting. It’s such an honor. It’s such hard work! The funny thing? It’s not just my own biological children that call me, or have called me mom. I’m not so sure it is what I am called that matters as much as what I do with a gift I am given. The Scripture says that “children are a gift from the Lord”. I can’t imagine having tossed my “gifts” aside like they were worthless. What a treasure my children have been, and still are for that matter. But this mom thing has taken a few turns as well. There have been a few “divine diversions” along the way, things Rog and I didn’t expect, didn’t plan for, weren’t sure how to always deal with. But what we did have was God’s Word. And He is the great example of a parent. He became our model. And He said, “whosoever will may come.” He made His love known. It is unconditional. We didn’t have to become His perfect children first before He chose to love us and accept us with all our problems. And He doesn’t force His love on anyone. He just gives it, and keeps giving it even when it is rejected.
That is so like God. It’s much harder for me. I love people, maybe because so many have poured themselves and their love into me. I’m sure for someone that hasn’t had the benefit and blessing of knowing God’s love, or anyone else’s…I mean love the way it is supposed to be: unselfish, unyielding, unimposing, the kind of love explained in I Corinthians 13, that it might seem impossible to experience.
But it is possible.
“Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it
does not seek its own, is not easily provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in
unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all
things. Love never fails.”
Did you catch that? Love never fails. People fail love. There’s no denying that some people are harder to love, sadly even some children. They can provoke irritation, frustration; they can even be hateful, hurtful and dare I say, revolting. But I remind myself often that “love is not easily provoked”. And I can genuinely love the children and young people that God directs into my path because I know He loves them dearly and they need to know His love.
As to what they decide to call me when they’re not my own? I’m ok with ‘Mom.’ if that's what they comfortably or naturally choose. I’m not going to take that away from them. Am I privileged to bear the title? Yes, but it’s not about me really. It’s more about the fact that perhaps they’ve come to enjoy the compassion and nurture and teaching and training and all that a mom is, the way God intended. Just maybe they start to see themselves differently because a mom values them, believes in them, prays for them. And it does not take away from how dear it is to me to have my own children call me their version of Mother: “Mom”, “Momma”, even “MooMoo”! It’s about the relationship that is developed, the love, the trust, the mutual respect and appreciation.
These are my “divine diversions”, children other than my very own that maybe I did not expect to have a part in rearing. Instead of being annoyed by it or avoiding it, I have welcomed it. Not because of who I am, but rather because they are gifts from God to be cherished. Even the rotten, provoking ones! Who knows, but for the love of a mom that just wants them to know Jesus’ love, they would have no chance at the life God has planned for them.
I'm a mom. I don’t know what role God has placed you in, what opportunities He has given you to love others through Him in a way you didn't ask for or expect. Maybe it's Dad, aunt, mentor, friend. Don’t run from it, embrace your “divine diversions”, to His glory and your blessing.
“Suffer the little children to come unto me, and forbid them not, for of such is the kingdom of God”. Mark 10:14
Tuesday, January 29, 2013
The View from the Mountaintop
In 2010, I wrote a piece about a chalk artist and the impact the drawing and the message had on my life. It was a beautiful, but sad picture of Moses on Mount Pisgah looking out over his beautiful promised land. He was given a chance to see it, but he could not go in. Why? Because he had disobeyed God’s command to speak to a rock rather than strike it. Angry and irritated with the very provoking and demanding group of people he was leading, he once again struck the rock to provide water in the wilderness when God had instructed him to simply speak to it. God in His great mercy, provided water once again to the thirsty group, however ungrateful and complaining they were. But Moses should never have struck the rock this second time.
Moses did not know at the time all that the rock represented. The New Testament explains in I Corinthians 10 that the Rock in the wilderness was Jesus who would be smitten for the sin of the world. And he would be smitten once only. Moses struck the rock twice. He didn’t need to know the details of these future events concerning Christ the Rock in order to obey. Yet in that moment, he allowed his frustration over the people’s ungrateful demands to get the best of him.
For many years I only saw in this situation what seemed to be so unfair. But the anger I experienced early on in my walk with the Lord at the thought of this apparent unfairness has long been replaced with love and trust in a Sovereign God who always acts with our good in mind and for His glory. There was still something about it all I didn’t fully understand, but I had let it go. And until Rog spoke on this very subject Sunday evening, I hadn’t really thought about it again. He presented a different perspective on the whole situation. And for the first time I saw God’s mercy at work in Moses’ life rather than judgment. And what a difference a change in perspective can make.
God had told Moses that because of his disobedience he would not be allowed to enter the land of promise. How terrible it would have been for Moses to remain on this side of Jordan knowing that the people he had led were living on the other side. Instead, God lovingly took him home from this mountaintop. Rather than focusing on what Moses had missed out on, I realized what he was given! He was given a view from the mountaintop, and that view must have been amazing. He caught a glimpse of all that was in store for those that would come after him. He had made a difference, and others were going to be blessed because of him and his willingness to be used of God as their leader.
What a revelation! And how humbling! How easy it is to focus on what I am not getting to do, what I don’t have, what I think I’m missing out on…and miss all that God has for me in the process. No longer do I feel sorry for Moses, or feel he was treated unfairly. I just can’t see any regret or longing on his face when I think of it now; only a deep contented peace and a joyful acceptance of God’s plan for him. He climbed that mountain, took in the view, and went home to be with his God.
And what a view it must have been.
Deuteronomy 32:48-52; 34:1-8
Questions to ask:
Am I making a difference for those that will come behind?
Am I content with all God has done and is doing in my life, or grumbling about what I think it
should or could be?
Is my life about acceptance and joy, or resistance and resignation to what I can’t change?
Moses did not know at the time all that the rock represented. The New Testament explains in I Corinthians 10 that the Rock in the wilderness was Jesus who would be smitten for the sin of the world. And he would be smitten once only. Moses struck the rock twice. He didn’t need to know the details of these future events concerning Christ the Rock in order to obey. Yet in that moment, he allowed his frustration over the people’s ungrateful demands to get the best of him.
For many years I only saw in this situation what seemed to be so unfair. But the anger I experienced early on in my walk with the Lord at the thought of this apparent unfairness has long been replaced with love and trust in a Sovereign God who always acts with our good in mind and for His glory. There was still something about it all I didn’t fully understand, but I had let it go. And until Rog spoke on this very subject Sunday evening, I hadn’t really thought about it again. He presented a different perspective on the whole situation. And for the first time I saw God’s mercy at work in Moses’ life rather than judgment. And what a difference a change in perspective can make.
God had told Moses that because of his disobedience he would not be allowed to enter the land of promise. How terrible it would have been for Moses to remain on this side of Jordan knowing that the people he had led were living on the other side. Instead, God lovingly took him home from this mountaintop. Rather than focusing on what Moses had missed out on, I realized what he was given! He was given a view from the mountaintop, and that view must have been amazing. He caught a glimpse of all that was in store for those that would come after him. He had made a difference, and others were going to be blessed because of him and his willingness to be used of God as their leader.
What a revelation! And how humbling! How easy it is to focus on what I am not getting to do, what I don’t have, what I think I’m missing out on…and miss all that God has for me in the process. No longer do I feel sorry for Moses, or feel he was treated unfairly. I just can’t see any regret or longing on his face when I think of it now; only a deep contented peace and a joyful acceptance of God’s plan for him. He climbed that mountain, took in the view, and went home to be with his God.
And what a view it must have been.
Deuteronomy 32:48-52; 34:1-8
Questions to ask:
Am I making a difference for those that will come behind?
Am I content with all God has done and is doing in my life, or grumbling about what I think it
should or could be?
Is my life about acceptance and joy, or resistance and resignation to what I can’t change?
Tuesday, January 1, 2013
Death...it keeps life in perspective.
I’ve been mulling over a Daily Bread devotional that was very thought-provoking. It spoke volumes to me in several ways, and not just because I’m on the other side of 50 rolling downhill, even faster than usual these days it seems (Is it really the first day of 2013?)! The devotional offered a look at death from something other than the doomsday drama that has surrounded much of recent months. After surviving the end of the world a couple of times now due to miscalculations, or something like that, (was it May 21st, or 26th; no, Oct 21st)? Then the end of the world as the Mayan calendar expired (perhaps they planned on continuing at a later time and just never got around to it, who knows?). Not to mention all the talk about ‘wars and rumors of wars’ (which have been from the beginning of time practically) and all the terrible natural disasters and ‘acts of God’ (as they’re called by insurance companies that don’t cover the losses).
Depressed yet? Well, don’t be. The main idea of The Power of Terminal Thinking (David McCasland, ODB 12/31/12) was not to encourage morbid or unhealthy thoughts of dying, but rather to present the idea that a proper understanding of death and its certainty should provide a ‘dynamic approach to living’. It can, and it should.
Still not excited? I must admit I had all but forgotten the initial impact, especially of the Scripture cited with the devotional, until today:
“Lord, make me to know my end, and what is the measure of my days, that I may know how frail I am…Certainly every man at his best state is but vapor” Psalm 39:4-5.
Today I talked with my mom on the phone and learned of the death of one that at one time was a close friend of my brother’s. They grew up together and had kept in touch until recent years. This man in his late 40’s went to Florida “on vacation” over Christmas, and jumped out of a thirteen-story hotel window.
That news shook me, as has the news of other tragic deaths, some even closer to home than this one. But this one bothered me in a different, less emotional way. It was just sobering. Maybe because while I was on the phone, the television was blaring about the fiscal cliff we had just apparently gone over. At one time at least, finances and financial status had meant a great deal to this fellow, and my brother too for that matter. I don’t know if that had anything to do with his decision to end his life, especially in this awful way, but I couldn’t help but think as I listened to the news commentator that we may likely hear of much of this during this next year. I remember hearing stories from my grandfather about ‘people jumping out of windows’ after the 1929 Stock Market crash and the days of depression that followed. His thought was that people just lost all hope of ever recovering. My thought? It is perfectly understandable, though terribly regretful, if their only hope of a continued existence was in their financial holdings.
Yes, we are frail and but a vapor, and it does us good to be reminded. But only if it turns our thought to the love of our God that created us and desires to sustain us as we place our trust and hope in Him.
You have taken hold of my right hand.
With Your counsel You will guide me and afterward receive me to glory.
Whom have I in heaven but You?
And besides You, I desire nothing on earth.
My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my
portion forever.
Psalms 73: 24-26
Thoughts of death and dying are undeniably troubling, and they should be to an appropriate degree. But the right view of death known to the believer is to give us the healthy and abundant perspective of life God wants us to have.
He wants us to truly live.
“I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.” John 10:10
Have a Happy 2013 in all the ways that really matter!
For additional insights on this and other subjects, may I suggest you visit the Radio Bible Class web site? It is one of many valuable resources I have enjoyed over the years; www.rbc.org .
Depressed yet? Well, don’t be. The main idea of The Power of Terminal Thinking (David McCasland, ODB 12/31/12) was not to encourage morbid or unhealthy thoughts of dying, but rather to present the idea that a proper understanding of death and its certainty should provide a ‘dynamic approach to living’. It can, and it should.
Still not excited? I must admit I had all but forgotten the initial impact, especially of the Scripture cited with the devotional, until today:
“Lord, make me to know my end, and what is the measure of my days, that I may know how frail I am…Certainly every man at his best state is but vapor” Psalm 39:4-5.
Today I talked with my mom on the phone and learned of the death of one that at one time was a close friend of my brother’s. They grew up together and had kept in touch until recent years. This man in his late 40’s went to Florida “on vacation” over Christmas, and jumped out of a thirteen-story hotel window.
That news shook me, as has the news of other tragic deaths, some even closer to home than this one. But this one bothered me in a different, less emotional way. It was just sobering. Maybe because while I was on the phone, the television was blaring about the fiscal cliff we had just apparently gone over. At one time at least, finances and financial status had meant a great deal to this fellow, and my brother too for that matter. I don’t know if that had anything to do with his decision to end his life, especially in this awful way, but I couldn’t help but think as I listened to the news commentator that we may likely hear of much of this during this next year. I remember hearing stories from my grandfather about ‘people jumping out of windows’ after the 1929 Stock Market crash and the days of depression that followed. His thought was that people just lost all hope of ever recovering. My thought? It is perfectly understandable, though terribly regretful, if their only hope of a continued existence was in their financial holdings.
Yes, we are frail and but a vapor, and it does us good to be reminded. But only if it turns our thought to the love of our God that created us and desires to sustain us as we place our trust and hope in Him.
You have taken hold of my right hand.
With Your counsel You will guide me and afterward receive me to glory.
Whom have I in heaven but You?
And besides You, I desire nothing on earth.
My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my
portion forever.
Psalms 73: 24-26
Thoughts of death and dying are undeniably troubling, and they should be to an appropriate degree. But the right view of death known to the believer is to give us the healthy and abundant perspective of life God wants us to have.
He wants us to truly live.
“I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.” John 10:10
Have a Happy 2013 in all the ways that really matter!
For additional insights on this and other subjects, may I suggest you visit the Radio Bible Class web site? It is one of many valuable resources I have enjoyed over the years; www.rbc.org .
Tuesday, December 25, 2012
Good News!
A Blessed Christmas morn to everyone! The joy that the Lord impressed me with early in this Christmas season, though interrupted and challenged by the news of Newtown, is still springing up. It is like the Sweet Lord to guide His children through the troubled waters to the wellspring that His joy is in the heart of His children.
Mine swelled this morning as my second son gathered the family into the living room, quieted the children and began to read the precious story of Christmas. Good news. Great Joy. It is as good and great this morning in this room as it was that holy night, that moment of glory as praise burst from the stars with the angels’ song.
Little Lily, the youngest, sat in her daddy’s lap; Great Grandma sat across the room in the rocker, wrapped in a warm fuzzy Christmas fleece; Jordan, our young adult daughter held Elijah, the boy in the bunch. Makenzie, the oldest grandchild is curled up next to her Nana (maternal grandmother) and Babbu (maternal grandpa) held Faith. Together as several generations, we listened intently and then bowed in prayer together worshipping Him whom we celebrate today.
And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord.
Memories to be cherished. Christmas joys.
Mine swelled this morning as my second son gathered the family into the living room, quieted the children and began to read the precious story of Christmas. Good news. Great Joy. It is as good and great this morning in this room as it was that holy night, that moment of glory as praise burst from the stars with the angels’ song.
Little Lily, the youngest, sat in her daddy’s lap; Great Grandma sat across the room in the rocker, wrapped in a warm fuzzy Christmas fleece; Jordan, our young adult daughter held Elijah, the boy in the bunch. Makenzie, the oldest grandchild is curled up next to her Nana (maternal grandmother) and Babbu (maternal grandpa) held Faith. Together as several generations, we listened intently and then bowed in prayer together worshipping Him whom we celebrate today.
And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord.
Memories to be cherished. Christmas joys.
Thursday, December 13, 2012
JOY!
The celebrating is in full swing…tree trimming, stocking stuffing, gift shopping, gift wrapping, parties, programs, banquets, caroling, lights, candy canes, sugar cookies, peppermint mocha coffee and wassel …you get the idea! The excitement builds by the day. Some people call it Christmas magic. Some call it sappy sentimentality. Rog and I call it Christmas joy. And we pray you have it too! It starts down deep inside at the thought of a loving Creator God sending His beloved Son to earth to die for the likes of sinful man. Consider the words to the following song:
I think about the baby and the man at Christmastime,
the mothers, sons, and fathers, and children just like mine;
about the power in unselfishness, love and sacrifice,
the Gift that we were given, and the price.
Roger reminded us in his message from Isaiah 12 on the first Sunday in December, that giving and getting and spending and debt is all often associated with Christmas. And even when we are trying to “keep Christ in Christmas”, we can get lost in it all if we’re not careful. Christmas cost God everything, and that means we have a reason to celebrate.
You can have a joy-filled Christmas this year. In spite of your situations, your circumstances, determine that the sacrifice Christ made for us is reason enough to have joy, especially this time of year. Pray one for another, especially for those so obviously hurting or alone. Love sacrificially. Give until it hurts. Keep reaching out! Get involved in your church or community, maybe in a way you never have before. Life is so full and God is so good. We don’t plan or ask for pain, disappointment, financial ups and downs, turbulent teens, parents battling aging and all its challenges, loved ones with serious illnesses, or precious little time with friends we love and miss. But we still joy in Him who by His mercy graces us with these many ways to trust Him, honor Him, praise Him. His love never fails.
O Lord, I will praise you!
Sing to the Lord, for He has done excellent things!
Cry out and shout… for great is the Holy One…in your midst. from Isaiah 12
Wednesday, December 12, 2012
The Star
There was a star in the Eastern sky
That shone down on Bethlehem,
A few had recognized the sign
A King was born to them
Drew them to a manger
To a virgin mother's son
Who would draw us to salvation
God's gift to everyone
And the star still shines
After all this time
As a light for me and you
It beckons us to seek him
Wise men still do
Wise men still do
In these crazy troubled times
The world seems so out of tune
Sometime's it's like we're living
Without a flame to light the room
If you're feeling faithless
And you think you've lost your way
O there is a hope that's bright enough
To turn your night to day
Diamond Rio, The Star Still Shines, 10.9.2007
I was going through Christmas decorations, sorting them by what to keep and what was way past time to throw out. My son Aaron was across the room at the desk on the computer doing some homework. I had been sitting for a few moments, holding ‘the star’, a cardboard cutout stapled to a toilet paper roll and covered in aluminum foil. I couldn’t bring myself to toss it in the throw away pile. We could afford better now, and I had looked for another tree topper, but nothing seemed suitable. Should I keep looking? Maybe I would use a bow this year instead. Even if I replaced “the star”, I’d hang on to it. As I sat there thinking about the Christmas I made that star and how tough that year had been, Aaron spoke:
“I love that star!” I looked up. “You’re not going to get rid of it, are you?”
“Of course not!” I replied. He smiled and went back to work. That was years ago, and that star tops our tree to this day. It represents a precious, though difficult memory of less fortunate times but of a faithful God. Aaron was only two the year that star was made. It’s the only topper he ever remembered seeing. So when I heard him say, “I love that star,” well, tossing it out would have been like tossing out part of what God had used to reveal himself to him.
That star is more than just cardboard and aluminum foil. It is part of Christmas and the reason we celebrate. It has been re-wrapped quite a few times, but oh does it shine! It represents hope, and a God who lights our way. Because of Him we don’t walk in darkness or confusion. Sometimes we must wait for direction, but He is always there letting us know we can trust Him for our every step.
The wise men followed the Star, and as the song says, “Wise men still do."
That shone down on Bethlehem,
A few had recognized the sign
A King was born to them
Drew them to a manger
To a virgin mother's son
Who would draw us to salvation
God's gift to everyone
And the star still shines
After all this time
As a light for me and you
It beckons us to seek him
Wise men still do
Wise men still do
In these crazy troubled times
The world seems so out of tune
Sometime's it's like we're living
Without a flame to light the room
If you're feeling faithless
And you think you've lost your way
O there is a hope that's bright enough
To turn your night to day
Diamond Rio, The Star Still Shines, 10.9.2007
I was going through Christmas decorations, sorting them by what to keep and what was way past time to throw out. My son Aaron was across the room at the desk on the computer doing some homework. I had been sitting for a few moments, holding ‘the star’, a cardboard cutout stapled to a toilet paper roll and covered in aluminum foil. I couldn’t bring myself to toss it in the throw away pile. We could afford better now, and I had looked for another tree topper, but nothing seemed suitable. Should I keep looking? Maybe I would use a bow this year instead. Even if I replaced “the star”, I’d hang on to it. As I sat there thinking about the Christmas I made that star and how tough that year had been, Aaron spoke:
“I love that star!” I looked up. “You’re not going to get rid of it, are you?”
“Of course not!” I replied. He smiled and went back to work. That was years ago, and that star tops our tree to this day. It represents a precious, though difficult memory of less fortunate times but of a faithful God. Aaron was only two the year that star was made. It’s the only topper he ever remembered seeing. So when I heard him say, “I love that star,” well, tossing it out would have been like tossing out part of what God had used to reveal himself to him.
That star is more than just cardboard and aluminum foil. It is part of Christmas and the reason we celebrate. It has been re-wrapped quite a few times, but oh does it shine! It represents hope, and a God who lights our way. Because of Him we don’t walk in darkness or confusion. Sometimes we must wait for direction, but He is always there letting us know we can trust Him for our every step.
The wise men followed the Star, and as the song says, “Wise men still do."
Friday, November 16, 2012
Thanksgiving!
I look forward to a mouth-watering turkey sandwich all year. And there are other treats saved just for this time of year also, or if we do happen to have them at some point throughout the year they still have to be included in the Thanksgiving Day meal.
When Rog and I married, our traditions merged. I brought some of my southern country-style background into the menu and of course he had some favorites that I picked up, like green bean casserole. Can you believe I never had a green bean casserole before I was married? Many of the dishes are recipes handed down to me from my mother and grandmothers.
Thought I would share our meal and invite you to share yours. I love hearing about the different family traditions. And I hope you have them. If you don’t, then start this year. It’s something your children will look back on and want to pass down. The generational connectedness is so very important. We need a sense of where we came from and who we are. It strengthens identity. It may be one reason so many young people, and even adults, struggle with issues of acceptance and belonging. God established the family and ordained it. Scripture has much to say about a generational heritage. If you have a godly heritage, thank Him for it. If you don’t, determine you will be the beginning of one for those that come after you. And hopefully you are sitting down together for a family meal more than once a year!
Harding Thanksgiving Menu
Turkey with stuffing and giblet gravy
ham
mashed potatoes
potato salad
sweet potato casserole
green bean casserole
collards
squash
deviled eggs
dinner rolls
cranberry relish
pumpkin pie
chocolate cream pie
coconut pie
While some people stuff a turkey, I never have. My grandmother always baked her stuffing separately, so even if I use Stove Top (which I usually do) I use chicken broth instead of water when I mix it and I bake it until crusty brown on top. The potato salad is a mustard potato salad. My grandmother always put bread and butter pickles, canned at home, in hers. But my boys didn’t always care for that so I modified it a bit. I just stir in some vinegar to give it a little kick (sorry guys, I may never have divulged that secret before!).
The sweet potato casserole was borrowed from a neighbor while in Bible college, the days when we used each other’s ovens and washer/dryers and whatever else was needed! She had family coming and was running out of room in her oven. Not everything was done so she came over and put that casserole in my oven. It smelled so scrumptious I had to have the recipe. We had always included candied yams before so this was a delicious and different way to still include them. My son Seth claimed this dish as a favorite. I remember his first Thanksgiving away from home, calling to ask, “Mom, I need to know how to fix the sweet potato casserole.” Thank you Wendy!
The collards and squash were southern garden delights. I laugh when some people don’t even know what collards are! My grandmothers, and my mother after them, would season the collards with the ham hock from the ham. Have you ever heard of pot liquor? It was the broth made from the ham hock and collards when they cooked down. My maternal grandmother loved it. The squash were actually summer squash that had been frozen when first picked. They were thawed, then fried with bacon and onions with lots of pepper. I’ve not grown a garden since I left home. Well, we did make a couple of attempts, but I don’t have a green thumb. I try though, to have collards and squash on the table each year if at all possible. Thankful for farmer’s markets and frozen foods!
As you can see, this was simple fair. When I was younger, the ham for my family came from my grandpa’s smokehouse. He raised his own hogs and every fall there was a “hog killing” (thus many dishes with bacon or ham). The vegetables came from the garden. And the potatoes had their own field. Before the first hard frost, my granddaddy gathered the grandkids together to dig potatoes. He would break up the ground with the tractor. We would walk behind, digging hands and toes in the cool dirt. When a bushel basket was filled, it was set aside until he came back around later with the tractor and wagon to pick them up.
There are some things I just can’t replicate. But though the process may be different and the recipes varied a bit, it’s the idea of a family heritage being enjoyed and passed down that’s important. It’s also about knowing that we’ve created a few traditions of our own. I happen to love pumpkins and anything made from pumpkin. So I always make bread…and I use fresh pumpkin. Roger’s maternal grandmother baked pumpkin and zucchini bread, and apple cake. Those recipes came from her. It fascinated me that she baked them in coffee cans! I never used a coffee can, but I did bake lots of pumpkin bread. I found a recipe for a cream cheese orange marmalade spread to use with it. Oh I can taste it now with a cup of hazelnut coffee! We would munch on the bread and some ham for breakfast while watching the parades and waiting for everything else to be prepared. My turkey had cooked overnight so my oven was free. A vegetable tray with some cheese and crackers kept “the pickers” away (everyone that wanted to come by and sample the fixings because they were starving!).
By the time the meal was done and everyone was fat and happy it was time for football. Four boys with four different favorite teams always guarantees an exciting afternoon! Of course we had a family team also, so there was still some unity among the fan craziness. And everyone is a commentator. In fact, it was our three year old granddaughter who recently made the comment while watching the Redskins play, “these guys need some professionals to play!” Out of the mouth of babes; I guess they weren’t having the best day.
Our situations have changed. My love for the holiday hasn’t. My grandparents have all passed on now and I’m left with wonderful memories. We don’t get down to my folks for Thanksgiving much anymore. In fact, they spend it at their cottage at the beach. We’re not always able to have our own children in for the holiday either. Sometimes they can be home; sometimes they are sharing it with others. But the connection and closeness is not affected by the miles between us. In fact, it is stronger in spite of it. It takes some effort, and my daughter-in-laws are better at it than I am. They’re all so sensitive to the fact that we love “seeing” our children and grandchildren and spending time with them. So we talk a lot, we share on facebook, they send pictures and cards. They let the kids call. And I love seeing the traditions they are building now with their families. I look forward to my mom calling me faithfully every Sunday morning on the way to church, even if it goes to voice mail when I’m not in range, I know she’s called. I call her back as soon as I can. These are the things that matter.
Enjoy a beautiful Thanksgiving Day. Appreciate the opportunity to purposefully be thankful to God for all His great blessings. And be careful to consider the eternal as well as the temporal when rendering up thanksgiving to Him, not only for all He has provided materially, but for who He is and all He has done. Tell your children that family and friendships are gifts from God. Be thankful for them and never take them for granted. Share stories. Share the meal. Share memories. Pray together.
“I will open my mouth in a parable; I will utter dark sayings of old, which we have heard and known, and our fathers have told us. We will not hide them from their children, telling to the generation to come the wonderful works that He has done. For He established a testimony in Jacob, and appointed a law in Israel, which He commanded our fathers, that they should make them known to their children; that the generation to come might know them, the children who would be born, that they may arise and declare them to their children, that they may set their hope in God and not forget the works of God but keep His commandments.” Psalm 78:2-7
“So we, Your people and sheep of Your pasture, Will give You thanks forever; We will show forth Your praise to all generations.” Psalm 79:13
And later that evening when you eat that turkey sandwich before heading off to bed, think of me…I’ll be having one too.
When Rog and I married, our traditions merged. I brought some of my southern country-style background into the menu and of course he had some favorites that I picked up, like green bean casserole. Can you believe I never had a green bean casserole before I was married? Many of the dishes are recipes handed down to me from my mother and grandmothers.
Thought I would share our meal and invite you to share yours. I love hearing about the different family traditions. And I hope you have them. If you don’t, then start this year. It’s something your children will look back on and want to pass down. The generational connectedness is so very important. We need a sense of where we came from and who we are. It strengthens identity. It may be one reason so many young people, and even adults, struggle with issues of acceptance and belonging. God established the family and ordained it. Scripture has much to say about a generational heritage. If you have a godly heritage, thank Him for it. If you don’t, determine you will be the beginning of one for those that come after you. And hopefully you are sitting down together for a family meal more than once a year!
Harding Thanksgiving Menu
Turkey with stuffing and giblet gravy
ham
mashed potatoes
potato salad
sweet potato casserole
green bean casserole
collards
squash
deviled eggs
dinner rolls
cranberry relish
pumpkin pie
chocolate cream pie
coconut pie
While some people stuff a turkey, I never have. My grandmother always baked her stuffing separately, so even if I use Stove Top (which I usually do) I use chicken broth instead of water when I mix it and I bake it until crusty brown on top. The potato salad is a mustard potato salad. My grandmother always put bread and butter pickles, canned at home, in hers. But my boys didn’t always care for that so I modified it a bit. I just stir in some vinegar to give it a little kick (sorry guys, I may never have divulged that secret before!).
The sweet potato casserole was borrowed from a neighbor while in Bible college, the days when we used each other’s ovens and washer/dryers and whatever else was needed! She had family coming and was running out of room in her oven. Not everything was done so she came over and put that casserole in my oven. It smelled so scrumptious I had to have the recipe. We had always included candied yams before so this was a delicious and different way to still include them. My son Seth claimed this dish as a favorite. I remember his first Thanksgiving away from home, calling to ask, “Mom, I need to know how to fix the sweet potato casserole.” Thank you Wendy!
The collards and squash were southern garden delights. I laugh when some people don’t even know what collards are! My grandmothers, and my mother after them, would season the collards with the ham hock from the ham. Have you ever heard of pot liquor? It was the broth made from the ham hock and collards when they cooked down. My maternal grandmother loved it. The squash were actually summer squash that had been frozen when first picked. They were thawed, then fried with bacon and onions with lots of pepper. I’ve not grown a garden since I left home. Well, we did make a couple of attempts, but I don’t have a green thumb. I try though, to have collards and squash on the table each year if at all possible. Thankful for farmer’s markets and frozen foods!
As you can see, this was simple fair. When I was younger, the ham for my family came from my grandpa’s smokehouse. He raised his own hogs and every fall there was a “hog killing” (thus many dishes with bacon or ham). The vegetables came from the garden. And the potatoes had their own field. Before the first hard frost, my granddaddy gathered the grandkids together to dig potatoes. He would break up the ground with the tractor. We would walk behind, digging hands and toes in the cool dirt. When a bushel basket was filled, it was set aside until he came back around later with the tractor and wagon to pick them up.
There are some things I just can’t replicate. But though the process may be different and the recipes varied a bit, it’s the idea of a family heritage being enjoyed and passed down that’s important. It’s also about knowing that we’ve created a few traditions of our own. I happen to love pumpkins and anything made from pumpkin. So I always make bread…and I use fresh pumpkin. Roger’s maternal grandmother baked pumpkin and zucchini bread, and apple cake. Those recipes came from her. It fascinated me that she baked them in coffee cans! I never used a coffee can, but I did bake lots of pumpkin bread. I found a recipe for a cream cheese orange marmalade spread to use with it. Oh I can taste it now with a cup of hazelnut coffee! We would munch on the bread and some ham for breakfast while watching the parades and waiting for everything else to be prepared. My turkey had cooked overnight so my oven was free. A vegetable tray with some cheese and crackers kept “the pickers” away (everyone that wanted to come by and sample the fixings because they were starving!).
By the time the meal was done and everyone was fat and happy it was time for football. Four boys with four different favorite teams always guarantees an exciting afternoon! Of course we had a family team also, so there was still some unity among the fan craziness. And everyone is a commentator. In fact, it was our three year old granddaughter who recently made the comment while watching the Redskins play, “these guys need some professionals to play!” Out of the mouth of babes; I guess they weren’t having the best day.
Our situations have changed. My love for the holiday hasn’t. My grandparents have all passed on now and I’m left with wonderful memories. We don’t get down to my folks for Thanksgiving much anymore. In fact, they spend it at their cottage at the beach. We’re not always able to have our own children in for the holiday either. Sometimes they can be home; sometimes they are sharing it with others. But the connection and closeness is not affected by the miles between us. In fact, it is stronger in spite of it. It takes some effort, and my daughter-in-laws are better at it than I am. They’re all so sensitive to the fact that we love “seeing” our children and grandchildren and spending time with them. So we talk a lot, we share on facebook, they send pictures and cards. They let the kids call. And I love seeing the traditions they are building now with their families. I look forward to my mom calling me faithfully every Sunday morning on the way to church, even if it goes to voice mail when I’m not in range, I know she’s called. I call her back as soon as I can. These are the things that matter.
Enjoy a beautiful Thanksgiving Day. Appreciate the opportunity to purposefully be thankful to God for all His great blessings. And be careful to consider the eternal as well as the temporal when rendering up thanksgiving to Him, not only for all He has provided materially, but for who He is and all He has done. Tell your children that family and friendships are gifts from God. Be thankful for them and never take them for granted. Share stories. Share the meal. Share memories. Pray together.
“I will open my mouth in a parable; I will utter dark sayings of old, which we have heard and known, and our fathers have told us. We will not hide them from their children, telling to the generation to come the wonderful works that He has done. For He established a testimony in Jacob, and appointed a law in Israel, which He commanded our fathers, that they should make them known to their children; that the generation to come might know them, the children who would be born, that they may arise and declare them to their children, that they may set their hope in God and not forget the works of God but keep His commandments.” Psalm 78:2-7
“So we, Your people and sheep of Your pasture, Will give You thanks forever; We will show forth Your praise to all generations.” Psalm 79:13
And later that evening when you eat that turkey sandwich before heading off to bed, think of me…I’ll be having one too.
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